C.C.'s Bubble World

    嶄新的一年該是在快樂的歡愉中開啟序幕，今年卻完全變了調。

    昨晚，貪圖一煙在手快感的大舅到一樓打開門享受吞雲吐霧的快樂，卻沒注意何小咪跑出去而關上門上樓休息睡覺。仍在熟睡的我們被老媽的叫喊聲吵醒，或該說是驚醒。「何小咪不見了!!!」這句話就如何不定時炸彈般，把我們炸醒，顧不及還未刷牙和洗臉，穿上外套就往外頭跑，開始尋找她的蹤跡。失了方寸的我們在附近找了又找、問了又問，邊走邊喊她的名字，深怕與她擦身而過，不知經過多久的找尋，腦袋空白的我托著手軟腳軟的身軀回家，原冷靜不已的思緒已隨著時間的流逝漸漸消失，回到家開始嚎啕大哭，淚水隨著想念昨夜與她相處的點滴止不住地狂掉，好幾年不曾這樣大哭、大叫且沒有思緒；就連平常最冷靜的老媽也對老天大叫，當下的情緒已沒有任何字句可以形容，徹底的絕望；如真要形容，就好像當年在急診室外頭等待外婆的消息那般無助，且在漫長的等待後，得到的是醫生無力地搖搖頭，不治。那是何等的無奈和絕望!!兩隻最不易服輸的兩隻獅子，又再次受了重傷，這一次的傷口會有治癒的機會嗎?!

老天爺，我們顯少跟祢要求什麼，不特別祈求其它事情，

只願她能找到回家的路和我們一起繼續未完的故事。

     今年的圍爈少了過往的歡笑，就連步調也少了過去的輕快；就如同平常日那般，其實也不然，甚至多了無以言喻的沉重，心碎的沉重。包了一個大紅包給老媽，原想讓她開開心心過個好年，卻因為她的走失而沒了歡笑；明天要早起去載客人的老媽，正躺在身旁的床上睡覺，真的入睡了嗎？I don't think so.被子裡的她一直翻來覆去，想必是還未入睡要不就是睡不好；我呢？等會兒打算把自己灌醉然後倒頭大睡，說得如此輕鬆，真的可以如此經易入睡嗎？無法言語的我，把手機關機來隔絕所有的交談，害怕自己失去控制，寧可將自己關在耳機中的世界，徹底的冰冷才能讓我calm down。

     Which song am I listening to right now? Joanna's song, Let's Start From Here. 這是唯一能撫平現在失落及心痛的一首歌，我們在等待她的歸來，並跟她說let's start from here and continue our own story。

Giving up, why should I

I've come to far to forget
We're beautiful, we just got lost

Somewhere along the way
So much was missing when you went away
Let's start from here, lose the past
Change our minds, we don′t need a finish line
Let's take this chance don’t think too deep
Of all those promises we couldn′t seem to keep
I don't care where we go
Let's start from here

Standing here face to face
A finger on your lips
Don't say a word don't make a sound
Silence surrounds us now
Even when you were gone I felt you everywhere
Let' start from here, lose the past
Change our minds, we don′t need a finish line
Let's take this chance don’t think too deep
Of all those promises we couldn′t seem to keep
I don't care where we go
Let's start from here
Let's start from here

I've never been the one to open up
But you've always been the voive within
The only warmth from my cold heart
Let's start from here, lose the past
Change our minds, we don't need a finish line
Let's take this chance don’t think too deep
Of all those promises
Let's start from here, lose the past
Change our minds, we don't need a finish line
Let's take this chance don’t think too deep
Of all those promises we couldn't seem to keep
I don't care where we go
Let's start from here
Let's start from here
Let's start from here
Let's start from here